I seem to be in a negative mood lately. First there was an entire blog on food that I just don't get and now one on the movies I can't see how they ever got into production. Movies that are intentionally bad (for laughs) don't count.
Any remake of an old classic movie. I'm dying to see the new version of "The Day The Earth Stood Still". I saw the first one as a kid and it made me love all SciFi ever since. I just know I'm going to be disappointed when I see it.
Any Clint Eastwood comedy. He's just not a funny guy.
Citizen Kane: I know, the American Film Institute has voted this the greatest movie of all time. I do understand that the camera techniques, angles and lighting were way ahead of their time, but to spend two hours watching a movie where all of the characters are trying to find out what a dying man's last words mean (rosebud) and then find out it was only...... Since seeing this for the first time, I have looked at other movies from that era to see the differences, and I do admit that the technique is way ahead of it's time, but that ending still leaves me shaking my head. I'm anticipating everyone who hasn't watched this movie to now be writing me asking "what the hell does "rosebud' mean?" I can only say, watch the movie.
Jaws 3D: All of the actors from the previous Jaws films except the sherriffs wife decided to pass on this one. How can you make a movie without all of the main characters except for one that had a total of ten minutes screen time from the previous films? I almost put this one in the category of being bad on purpose, but I don't think these people were that smart.
Time Bandits: Let's cut up organized religion and little people and make it look like it's a serious fantasy movie. Shame on the late George Harrison.
Star Wars: Return of the Jedi: Let's make a movie where every character can be turned into a toy figure. Some really cute warrior teddy bears would really sell. And lets redo the big explosion scene from the first movie a second time, after all, what works once should be even better the second time around.
The Matrix 2 and 3: A 2 for 1 here. How such a great first movie could turn into 2 such horrible sequels is beyond me. The dance scene and the love scenes add nothing to these films and actually leave you with an icky feeling. They should have stayed with the theme of waking people up to reality. The brothers blew it on these two.
Mission to Mars: Josh and I went to see this one when it first came out. At one point in the film the actors turn to each other and make some comment on how bad the movie is that they're making. By that time, everyone in the theater already had it figured out. The only one that is worse then this one is....
Open Water: The first ten minutes of this film are on land while they prepare to go out on a scuba diving expedition. The next 90 minutes were spent with me cheering for the sharks to just eat them and get it over with so we could leave. The theater was packed too.
4 comments:
To each his own, but for my own sanity and in its defense...
Citizen Kane probably isn't the best movie ever made, but you would miss it if it never existed since the majority of movies since then use similar techniques in one way or another.
It's influences were critical not just from a technical standpoint but it popularized plot devices like flashbacks and "beginning at the end" as well. It doesn't deserve to be in this list. Even based on your own comments i'm not convinced you think it should never have been made.
Seeing Citizen Kane in the same list as Jaws 3D deeply disturbs me.
MAJOR SPOLIERS AHEAD!! DON'T READ BETWEEN THE LINES IF YOU WANNA SEE THE MOVIE!!
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The ending makes perfect sense and doesn't deserve all the bashing I've heard over the years. If you look at rosebud as just a sled, you're gonna hate the ending. It's what the sled represents that is important. It represents the one time in his life (childhood) when he was truly happy, even though he was poor. The point is, all the success and riches in the world aren't necessarily going to make you happy. Rosebud was his happy place, so that's where he goes when he dies.
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Return of the Jedi, although not up to the standards of its predecessors, is a very entertaining movie. Ask yourself if Episodes 1-3 are better than Return of the Jedi. If you say yes, you should seek help.
although, you probably hate it because we made you watch it a million times as kids, in which case i forgive you.
I have always been torn about Citizne Kane. I've watched it at least five times and the ending just strikes me as contrived, but I keep watching it. I'm almost willing to agree with you here but....Without that ending it would have been a much better movie.
Oh, Josh just waxed poetic on Citizen Kane. How nice.
You've really forgotten a whole group of movies--maybe since you're a guy--that are just plain bad: Romantic Comedies. There are a few good ones but the majority are just ridiculous. Jay particularly likes to disparage "Love Craptually."
!!!A truly inspired nomination! That movie was so forgetable I...forgot about it. Talk about bad plot, poor execution, and just plain disgusting. A bunch of disfunctional people put together in a plot that is only brought together at the end for a hokey ending and then they add in some really bad almost porn for "laughs". That must be the worst romantic comedy of all time. SOme romantic comedies are good for a few laughs as long as you don't expect much, but that one really takes the cake. I tried to watch it for a second time once but it was worse the second time around.
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